Hey, everyone! I’m so pumped to be writing this chapter in Leading Ladies about a concept that’s super close to my heart. Before we dive in, I want to express my gratitude to each of you for reading these words and taking the initiative to enrich yourselves by going deeper into the captivating world of Network Marketing. And second, I want to give you a quirky piece of advice that might raise an eyebrow—and that’s to “Be a Gold Digger.”

Now, hear me out, because it’s not what you think! I’m not going to tell any of you to chase after wealthy men to get rich, as the term “Gold Digging” commonly implies. Instead, we’re going to dive head-first into five transformative strategies that will unearth and nurture the potential in the amazing and talented people around you. That’s right! By using these methods, you’re going to get pure gold out of your team! Intrigued? Let’s get into it! 

First and foremost, I want to share with you a little bit about my background so you can understand where I’m coming from. I’m a proud Black Diamond earner with my company where I’ve had the privilege of sitting on the council for the past six-plus years! My journey in Network Marketing has led me to several platforms and stages, both within the USA and internationally, providing me with opportunities to share and learn from thousands. Milestones in my career have included multiple appearances in Prosper and Behind Her Brand magazines, training with industry legends like Darin & Jennifer Dowd, Jeremy & Mindy Deeble, Geoff & Kathryn Belleville, and Ray Higdon, just to name a few. My husband Josh and I were also selected to be official Ambassadors for Dr. John C. Maxwell, the world’s foremost author on leadership, as we advised him on his first and only book on Network Marketing, The Power of Five!

Beyond these professional achievements, I’m a devoted mother to two incredible kids, and I’ve been a wife for almost twenty-two years. Here’s a fun fact: I married my husband just three weeks after meeting him! Our journey has been extraordinary, with both of us building our legacy together. While he’s the academic achiever, with a Doctorate in Business Administration and a recent certification in plant medicine from Cornell University, I’ve always been the more visible face of our endeavors, particularly in the world of social media. We live in Montgomery, Texas, where we’re surrounded by a rich history and an environment that instills the values of freedom, family, and faith that we hold so dearly. These values have not just shaped my personal life but have also guided my leadership style. 

Growing up, I was never fond of traditional classroom education, so Network Marketing was a perfect fit for me based on the fact that learning was based on real-life experiences. If there’s one thing I’d emphasize to anyone new to the profession, it’s this: You’re either “green and growing” or “ripe and rotting.” In other words, if you’re not learning, you’re going backward. You can’t pour from an empty cup, after all, and so, if you’re going to pull gold from your team on a continual basis, then you’ll need to place yourself into situations where you can be poured into, and it’s up to you whether that’s digital or in-person! The bottom line is, surround yourself with mentors and plenty of opportunities for training!

The great part is, if you’re lifting yourself up in that way, the inevitable will happen—those around you will level up, too. I love the phrase, “A rising tide lifts all ships,” and that philosophy has always driven me to do more. By enhancing our individual capacities, we are sure to elevate everyone around us. My mission has consistently been to provide education, not just within my own team but to everyone eager to learn in this profession. I believe that empowering leaders is the most paramount step you can take to ensure a long-lasting and successful team. So, as we embark on this journey of “Gold Digging” together, I’m going to guide you on the path to understanding the ways you can extract the absolute best from the ladies you lead!

Map Her ‘Why’

To begin, we need to understand the motivation behind your team member’s involvement in Network Marketing in the first place. The ‘why’ connects all the dots! It’s the foundation of a person’s drive and ambition, and it’s about more than just financial goals—it’s about what those finances can accomplish. I’ve had so many new team members tell me that they just want to earn more money, but when I dig a bit deeper, I find out what that money will do in their lives or the lives of others.

Often, a powerful ‘why’ can bring tears to your eyes. In my case, my ‘why’ was to change my family’s financial habits, retire my husband, and give my daughter opportunities we couldn’t provide her with before, like dance lessons or private school. Sure, on the surface, the focus seemed to be about money—and it certainly involved money, but the actual ‘why’ was that I wanted to bring my family closer together, enrich their lives, and develop their gifts. 

And it’s not just important for you and your career—it’s critical for those you’re guiding. Knowing someone’s precise ‘why,’ the reason for someone’s drive and determination, can be the difference between their success and stagnation. ‘Whys’ are emotional and felt from the heart. Remember, if they’re not crying, you haven’t found their ‘why’ yet! 

Here are my favorite ways to map her ‘why’!

1. Create a private and comfortable environment. People will only open up to you if they feel emotionally and physically safe to do so. This is best done in person, but as a close second, a quiet video call will work just as well.
   
   
2. Be present and engaging. When you’re diving deep into someone’s dreams and aspirations, make sure you’re actively listening and showing her that you understand how seriously you are taking the conversation. No one wants to feel ignored when they’re being vulnerable!
   
   
3. Gently push her to go big. Most people are hesitant to think in grand terms, so they’ll give you the breadcrumbs of their dreams at first. When this happens, try to shift the conversation from basic necessities to larger goals. Encourage her to dream beyond her immediate needs, and to aim for legacy!
   
   
4. Get permission to remind her of her ‘why’ when things get hard. Her ‘why’ can be a powerful motivator when she’s thinking of backing away or giving up. Make sure you get the go-ahead to bring it back up to her!

Identify Her Shiny Strengths

As you’re listening to her tell you about herself and her ‘why,’ listen for her to subtly reveal her hidden strengths. It’s rare that you’ll find someone who will tell you what they’re great at right out of the gate, so it’s your job as a leader to tug on the threads of greatness when they show up in conversation.

For instance, if you’re talking to your team member about her ‘why,’ she might tell you that she’s been through a ton of hardship in her life—maybe she’s had to care for a sick family member or step into the role of single mom suddenly. The important thing to remember is that what she’s not telling you out loud is that she is an incredible nurturer, leader, and healer.

Make sure you point these strengths out to her! Remind her that she has innate problem-solving skills that she’s used to find forward motion in her personal life, and that anyone on your team would be fortunate to collaborate with her. By recognizing and emphasizing these qualities, you’re highlighting her invaluable attributes. 

Here are my favorite ways to identify her shiny strengths:

1. As she talks about her ‘why,’ listen to the history of what she’s been through. Even if she doesn’t realize it, she’s telling you all about her strengths as she recounts what she has survived and what she does best.
   
   
2. Capture those strengths so you can reference them later. Write down her strengths so that during challenging times, you can remind her that she’s powerful!

Believe The Gold Is There

In addition to their strengths, everyone has weaknesses, or what I consider to be areas of growth. The problem is when we decide that, because we’ve made those mistakes, we must not be worthy. That’s when we become our own worst enemy.

The truth is, we’ve all made mistakes in our bumpy pasts. However, despite those setbacks or weaknesses, our intrinsic value remains. So, if someone on your team is trying to tell you why they don’t think they can achieve a big goal, or why they can’t use their strengths to help others, it’s critical to use positive language to shift negative self-talk around fears and past failures.

I once spoke with a colleague who’d endured verbal abuse from family members, leading to diminished self-worth. By highlighting her resilience and passions, I aimed to shift her perspective, and I reminded her that her survival in that situation was a testament to her strength! 

Here are my favorite ways to help someone believe the gold is there:

1. Ask her about what’s holding her back—the fears, doubts, and past failures. Active listening is the cornerstone of this step, paired with affirmation that you see strength even when she doesn’t.
   
   
2. Redirect her negative self-perceptions by offering a fresh perspective. Remind her that every setback is just another lesson—another step closer to success. It’s about perseverance, believing in the potential that’s clearly visible to others, and helping her see it, too.
   
   
3. Replace her self-doubt with genuine self-belief. By reflecting on what she’s shared, emphasize her strengths, challenge her misconceptions, and replace her self-imposed limitations with limitless possibilities. This process can revolutionize her mindset and, consequently, her life!

Refine One Nugget At A Time

The journey to self-betterment is rarely straightforward. It often requires a laser focus on a single facet of our character, refinement of it, and then magnifying its potential! Take, for example, the task of refining a hidden strength that is overshadowed by a limiting belief. When a person recognizes this buried potential, it’s just like realizing there’s gold beneath her feet! However, recognizing the strength and harnessing its value are not one and the same.

Let’s say you’ve found a team member’s strength that you want to develop. Don’t wait to get started! Letting an opportunity or newfound realization sit idly by, collecting dust, is much like a pioneer discovering gold but refusing to dig. It’s of the utmost importance to give her a tangible task—a real and immediate action. Something as simple as this can often create a ripple effect of confidence!

In the many times I’ve ‘refined gold’ over the course of my career, a large number of women have confessed their deep-seated fear of going live on social media. If you’re comfortable on camera in front of a lot of people, it might seem like a trivial fear to you, but for some, it’s a very real phobia and can be debilitating. When this was the case with a fellow lady on my team, I challenged her to just do one simple, one-minute live video. The topic? Anything under the sun, from the chirping birds outside to her favorite book. And once she embarked on this challenge, I asked her to tag me, ensuring I would bear witness to her brave action. And what happened afterward was magic: this woman who was afraid before now had a win under her belt, and she gained the confidence to conquer more challenges. It’s so encouraging to realize that the very things we dread the most often transform into our strongest assets!

Here are my favorite ways to ‘refine her gold,’ one nugget at a time:

1. Identify her most prominent fear or weakness. What is she shying away from most? Sometimes she won’t be able to tell you, and you’ll have to observe it for yourself.
   
   
2. Focus only on the development of that area. We can’t fix all the things at once, can we? No! So, focus only on this one area and know that the rest of the nuggets will get refined in due time.
   
   
3. Take actionable steps toward a small win. It doesn’t have to be a huge accomplishment; it just needs to be enough to give her the confidence that she can improve and succeed.
   
   
4. Review, reassess, and seek a new challenge. When you’re finished with the first one, move on to the next! Just remember, this step is a never-ending cycle, and it’s one that promises growth, confidence, and a life governed less by fear.

Commit To The Dig

Commitment is essential to any successful venture. As leaders in Network Marketing, we see this first-hand when we find team members who aren’t getting the results they want because they struggle with dedication to their business. When this happens, taking proactive steps to keep them accountable can be absolutely transformative. It not only encourages their commitment, but it also demonstrates how invested you are in their growth! The metaphor of ‘committing to the dig’ is about continuing to uncover the potential that’s often hidden under layers of doubt and fear.

In the early stages of my career, there was a period where face-to-face meetings were my primary mode of interaction. And while this strategy actually led me to a high rank within my company, I realized that with success came challenges. There were nights of long drives and unsuccessful meetings, leading to weeks where I felt like I was spinning my wheels. And in the midst of this professional whirlwind, I felt like I was missing out on valuable time at home with my family. 

One night, after one of the worst weeks I’d had out there on the road (I hadn’t closed anything!), I walked through the front door, exhausted, and I realized that my daughter, a toddler at the time, had decided to cut her own hair while my husband was in another room on a business call. I had been waiting to give my daughter her first haircut, and now all her baby curls were on the floor. I was pushed to the brink, and I went into my closet and bawled my eyes out. I was questioning every choice I’d made, and I considered quitting right then and there.

But it’s moments just like these when the value of a mentor shines brightest. My husband immediately called my mentor and got me on the phone with her. She listened to my struggle, reminded me that there were going to be hard times, made me acknowledge the wins I had already made, and then shared some of the challenges of her own journey. Her stories of missed family events, and the eventual freedom and opportunities her success afforded her, painted a vivid picture for me: I could either quit and miss out on the life I’d imagined for my family, or I could keep going through the challenging times to see that life come to reality.

So, I buckled down. I asked different family members to watch the kids, I hired babysitters, and I even asked fellow church members to fill in at home! 

This is the essence of commitment: pushing through despite the odds, lifted up by the belief in yourself and the support of those around you. As leaders, it’s our responsibility to guide our teams through these inevitable challenges.

Here are my favorite ways to help her commit to the dig:

1. Remind her of her ‘why’. Remember this from the first step? Here’s where you’re going to bring it back up (as long as she already gave you permission to do so!). Ask her if something has changed. And if she says she wants to quit, ask her if she has a new plan to achieve that ‘why.’ It’s rare that she does.
   
   
2. Share your personal stories of challenging times. If she can understand that you’ve overcome obstacles to your success as well, she’ll believe she can do it, too.
   
   
3. Fix her vision. Success is rarely linear; in fact, most of the successful people you encounter will tell you that their path has been all over the place! Help her see past the obstacles to the life she’s imagined for herself.

Don’t Abandon The Mine

In the ever-changing world of Network Marketing, it’s easy to feel discouraged when members of your team or potential customers seem to vanish into what I like to call ‘ghost mines.’ These are the people you’re trying to partner with who, for one reason or another, become inactive or unresponsive. But here’s the golden rule: never abandon the mine!

When team members become ghosts, resist the urge to interpret their silence as disinterest. Instead, keep the communication channels open. Drop them simple, heartfelt messages, such as, “Hey! How are you? I want you to know I’m here for you.” By doing so, you’re letting them know that their well-being as a person matters to you more than a number in a business.

Years ago, a friend of mine was pursuing a significant business opportunity. The potential partner expressed initial interest but then went silent for months. When she came to me and asked for advice, I suggested a different approach. Instead of inquiring about the business, I recommended sending a message that simply read, “Are you okay?” To her surprise, she received a response within minutes. The potential partner had been out of the country, and this simple gesture reopened the line of communication, leading to a fruitful business partnership. While outcomes like this aren’t guaranteed, they illustrate the power of genuine concern.

And this speaks to a larger principle: people value authenticity! When you show genuine interest, you’re communicating that you see someone as more than just a business transaction. This personal touch is what sets successful Network Marketers apart. Remember, people don’t truly understand how much you care until you show them.

My favorite ways to make sure I don’t abandon the mine are:

1. Ask genuine questions, one at a time, and be patient. Questions like, “Are you okay?” and “Have you given up on this project?” are powerful in their simplicity and open-endedness.
   
   
2. If she responds negatively, offer support instead of judgment. Remind her of her ‘why.’ Encourage her to type out her ‘why’ and share it with you. Later, when she needs motivation, remind her of her ‘why’ by sending it back to her. A simple gesture, like sharing a captured memory of her ambition, can reignite her passion.
   
   
3. Continue to engage with her even if she seems distant. The phrase, “fortune is in the follow-up” holds true, but it’s about more than just persistence. It’s about care, consistency, and authenticity—so, go ahead and like, share, and comment on her posts.
   
   
4. Always remember the power of public visibility. You never know who’s watching you online, so be active on social media! I’ve been surprised multiple times by ‘ghosts’ on my page who, after a period of silent observation, finally reached out because they were inspired by my public posts. You might be the beacon someone needs, so keep shining, and keep going!

Watch Out For Bandits

As we move into our final lesson, I’d like to share a vital insight, which is to always be cautious of those who might obstruct your journey toward success. Just as miners guard their treasures against bandits, you must shield your ambitions against doubters and detractors!

Consider your aspirations to be much like a gold mine. There will always be people who will try to discredit your findings, insisting that what you’ve unearthed is mere fool’s gold. Such doubters might be motivated by their own insecurities, maybe even by their failure to dig deep enough in their ventures to ever find anything. Or perhaps they are driven by envy, so they refuse to rejoice in your success.

These so-called ‘bandits’ come in various forms, and I’ll go through them one by one:

Well-Intended Mis-informers. These are people who genuinely care for you, but they lack the expertise or experience to do so. Their intentions are rooted in the fear of seeing you get hurt, even if their worries are baseless. These people are usually family members and close friends.

Singular Path Advocates. This is the group that believes their way is the only right way. While their advice might be valuable in some contexts, it’s important to remember that multiple paths lead to success! And their way is not the only way to get there.

Crab Potters. This term comes from a unique phenomenon observed when crabs are piled into a bucket. When one crab tries to escape a bucket, others pull it down instead of working together so they can all have freedom. Similarly, some people would rather see you confined to their limitations rather than see you soar!

So, who can you take advice from? An essential piece of wisdom I’ve adhered to in my journey is this: only take advice from those whose lives you’d willingly trade places with, at least in the specific domain in which they’re offering advice. If someone excels in parenting but struggles financially, take their parenting advice but leave their financial guidance.

Remember, when you adopt someone’s advice, you implicitly accept the outcomes and consequences of their choices. This doesn’t only apply to finances but extends to all areas of life, from cooking to parenting to professional endeavors!

For instance, I have family members who have earned considerably, yet their work-life balance is skewed. Despite their financial success, I wouldn’t trade places with them because I value a balance that allows me to dictate my schedule.

So, that’s it! We’ve gone through all the ways to begin getting the best gold out of everyone you lead! Let’s review: 

Map Her ‘Why’. Before anything else, find out why she’s pursuing her goals. This ‘why’ should be profound, emotional, and authentic.

Identify Her Shiny Strengths. Every woman possesses unique strengths, the ‘shiny’ aspects of their character. Recognize and harness them.

Believe The Gold Is There. Be confident in the value of what you’re pursuing. Everyone has a reserve of gold within; it’s all about unearthing it.

Refine One Nugget At A Time. Focus on one strength at a time, refining and honing it to perfection. Then, move on to the next!

Commit To The Dig. Stay dedicated to your quest, nurturing your strengths and seeking continuous growth.

Don’t Abandon The Mine. Reach out and ask simple questions to those who have become distant, and make sure to stay connected via social media regardless of whether they re-engage right away.

Watch Out For Bandits. Naysayers will always be around, attempting to belittle your dreams or impose their insecurities upon you. Whether their intentions are to protect, or their attitude is born out of jealousy, or if it’s a mix of both, the decision to heed their advice lies with you. Remember to get mentors who you’d trade lives with!

Always remember—your worth transcends the limitations others might try to impose on you. I wholeheartedly believe in your potential! Stay blessed, stay driven, and thank you for joining me in this chapter!