Hello, fellow ntwrkrs, and congratulations on picking up this book! It feels like just yesterday when I finished my chapter in the last ntwrkr Publishing title, Create Community, but time certainly flies as life gets more exciting. I’m pumped to be teamed up with all these other talented and successful women, and It’s a privilege to share my insights and experiences in Network Marketing with you.

I’m writing this chapter from my home in Minneapolis, Minnesota, where I juggle life as a mom to two wonderful soon-to-be tweens and as the wife of my amazing husband, Tony. We’ve been on this incredible adventure together, building our business side by side for the past nineteen years. What a ride it’s been!

My career in Network Marketing began when I was just twenty-one, and over the years, I’ve navigated the waters of this profession in various stages of my life—as a single woman, a wife, and a mother. Each phase has offered unique challenges and opportunities, contributing to a well-rounded perspective I’m thrilled to share with you.

Despite a rocky start in my career (I didn’t recruit a single person in my first three years!) I’ve seen my business grow to astonishing heights with the company I’ve been with for over a decade. We’re doing almost one-hundred-fifty million in sales every year now, and I tell you that with both great excitement and great humility. It’s almost surreal to think about it, considering where I started twenty-five years ago, but here we are, with a thriving business that spans the globe. Tony and I are infinitely grateful for the prosperity we’ve been able to create for ourselves and others.

In my opinion, the secret to my success is the emphasis I’ve placed on cultivating genuine relationships. This chapter, which I fondly call ‘The ‘BE’ Attributes,’ focuses on this important aspect of Network Marketing. And in it, I’ll guide you through five key strategies that have not only transformed my business but my life as well.

So, what makes these strategies special, anyway? Well, they are simple yet profound. Often, we overlook the basics, thinking, “Oh, I know that already.” But knowing and doing are two different things, and I’ve learned this the hard way. Early in my career, I was engaging in plenty of conversations, but I wasn’t truly connecting with anyone. I was focusing on transactions, but I wasn’t getting any traction. There was a huge disconnect between me and my prospects, and I could feel that something just wasn’t working.

So, I decided to take a step back, slow down, and figure out what was missing from the way I interacted with people. Talking to them and inviting them to events just wasn’t enough—I needed to find out how to cultivate and maintain genuine relationships. And what I found out was that there really is a science behind it! Now, I’m going to share that science with you on these pages, and take you through my personal experiences to illustrate the following steps I believe are key to building relationships.

First, we’ll learn about how to be loving. Next, we’ll talk about how to show up and be human with other humans. We’ll then jump into strategies on how to be creative, and then follow that with insight on how to be valuable. Finally, we’ll discuss the reasons why it’s critical to be a rock. These might sound straightforward, but their power lies in their application. So, as we delve into each of these, I encourage you to not just read but to act! The goal is to embed these attributes into your daily practice. If you’re ready to reframe the ways you build relationships in your life and your business, let’s go!

Be Loving

What does it truly mean to be loving in the realm of both business and personal relationships? It’s about genuine care, putting others’ well-being and happiness at the forefront, and expressing this through our actions and words, every single day. The story I’m going to share with you throughout each section in this chapter is about an incredible woman named Amee, and how she became my best friend through my practice of The ‘BE’ Attributes.

I met Amee about fourteen years ago. Although we were both in the Network Marketing profession, we weren’t in the same company or downline. Our paths just crossed one day, and there was an instant connection. Have you ever experienced that instant recognition of love upon meeting someone? Well, that’s precisely what happened between Amee and me. 

I made a conscious decision to celebrate Amee’s successes within her own company, without ulterior motives, purely driven by love and admiration. Whether it was applauding her achievements as she reached new ranks at her company or simply checking in on her well-being, I made it a priority to show her love and support whenever I could. If she needed guidance, I was there. If I wanted to pay her a compliment, I didn’t hesitate. I went out of my way to make her feel good and important, solely for being her authentic self. 

This approach to relationships—meeting people where they are and making them feel valued without any hidden agendas—is the essence of being loving. It’s about nurturing genuine connections that can lead to long-lasting relationships and a robust network. If you can find ways to be loving, it will turn into your superpower, and be the “stickiness” that brings people into your life or business and makes them want to stay.

You may have already picked up on this by now, but the action step here is to commit to having incredible relationships and then do the work to make it happen. Resist the temptation to merely transact with people, and instead, look for ways to make others feel cared for and appreciated.

Be Human

The next essential element in cultivating lasting relationships in Network Marketing is to be human. This might sound obvious, but let’s dig deeper into what it truly means. Being human in our interactions is about authenticity, embracing the imperfections we all have, and understanding that everything we experience, from joyous moments to challenging crises, are just a part of this amazing thing called human life.

Take my friendship with Amee, for instance. As our relationship evolved beyond surface interactions, we discovered that our connection went deeper than simply being really fond of each other. We shared our successes and failures, our aspirations, and fears in conversations that veered in and out of our business and personal lives. Everything was on the table—from what excited us about our businesses to the family concerns that kept us awake all night. Our relationship was about understanding each other’s essence, or as I like to call it,  ‘peeling back the layers of the onion’ to reveal our true selves.

This level of honesty and openness is what being human is all about. It’s the willingness to present your authentic self, warts and all! In the early days of my career, I struggled to recruit anyone because I wasn’t being authentic. I was trying to emulate others, thinking that was the key to success. But this only created a barrier, preventing genuine connections.

Things began to change only when I started asking myself, “Am I okay with being me?” This is a crucial question for all of us. Are you comfortable with who you are, in all your imperfect glory? If not, it’s a journey you need to embark on. For me, accepting myself was a turning point. Suddenly, people who resonated with the real Sarah found me, drawn to my authenticity. So, here are the action steps I’d like you to take to become more human:

1. Start by presenting your true self. Embrace the messy and imperfect parts of your life. Remember, it’s not about creating an ideal image; it’s about being genuine.

2. Adopt a mindset of giving, not taking. Part of being human is about leaving a positive impact on everyone you meet. I always strive to ensure that people are better off for having met me! 

Being human means being vulnerable, open, and real. It’s about showing up as you are, and in doing so, attracting those who appreciate and resonate with your authenticity. This is how lasting, meaningful connections are formed, and these connections will go beyond business transactions to become the foundation of a happy life.

Be Creative

The third indispensable aspect of relationship-building in our profession lies in embracing creativity. As Network Marketers, the importance of staying connected with people cannot be overstated. Our lives are a whirlwind of responsibilities, from parenting to careers, and managing personal relationships. When we add business into this mix, it becomes a balancing act of keeping all these plates spinning!

Being creative in Network Marketing means proactively seeking innovative ways to connect and stay engaged with people, regardless of whether they join your business or become a customer. It’s about nurturing connections for their own sake.

You might be wondering how I maintained my relationship with Amee despite my growing business and my growing family, right? The answer is, I made an effort to remember and celebrate significant events in her life—birthdays, anniversaries, professional achievements. These gestures weren’t about business; they were about genuine care and celebration, and they didn’t take a lot of time. A simple call to check in, a message to say, ‘I’m thinking of you,’ or small, thoughtful gifts can make a world of difference.

We often receive intuitive nudges to reach out to someone. I encourage you to act on these. Believe me, a timely message or call can have a profound impact! It’s astounding how often people have told me, “I was just thinking about you,” or how a simple call can bring comfort and joy at just the right moment. These are the threads that weave strong, lasting connections. Now, let’s talk about action steps. 

1. Take a moment to connect online. Living in the digital age gives us plenty of opportunities to reach out to those we want to remember! Social media tags or DMs, emails, and texts can remind people that you’re thinking of them.

2. Get to a networking event. I know, events can be daunting for some! But if you can step out of your comfort zone and attend, then they can be incredibly rewarding. It’s in these moments, when we stretch ourselves, that we often forge the most meaningful connections and discover new opportunities.

So, challenge yourself to be the initiator. Don’t wait for others to reach out; take the first step. Be the one who brings energy and innovation into your interactions. Remember, the effort you put into creatively building and maintaining relationships is an investment in your personal and professional growth!

Be Valuable

The fourth key element in fostering meaningful relationships in Network Marketing is to be valuable. This concept revolves around the previously mentioned idea of being a giver rather than being a taker. We’ve all encountered people who constantly take without giving back, and we know how draining that can be, right? It’s important to ask yourself: How can I add value? How can I serve and support others?

Reflecting on my interactions with Amee, I often asked her, “How can I support you? What do you need from me?” This approach wasn’t about expecting something in return; it was about genuinely wanting to contribute to her success. Whether it was peer-to-peer support, mentorship, or brainstorming sessions, the focus was on being a helpful and empowering presence in her life.

However, being valuable isn’t just about what you can offer; it’s also about being open to learning from others. Every relationship has the potential to be mutually enriching. Acknowledge that others have valuable insights and experiences from which you can learn, creating a symbiotic and dynamic relationship.

Here are some actionable steps to embody the trait of being valuable:

1. Identify your skills. Consider the skills and knowledge you’ve developed. How can you use these to positively impact someone else’s life?

2. Share your knowledge. Think of three topics you’re passionate about that others can benefit from. Start sharing your insights and expertise on these subjects with people and gauge their interest, delivering more knowledge as they become more engaged.

3. Seek mutual growth. Approach every relationship with the mindset of both contributing and learning. Recognize that every individual you meet can teach you something valuable.

Being valuable in Network Marketing isn’t just about business transactions. It’s about enriching the lives of others, helping them grow, and being a source of encouragement and empowerment. This approach not only helps others but also fosters your own personal and professional growth. It’s about creating a network where everyone feels valued and supported.

Be A Rock

The final, yet crucial, element in cultivating relationships in Network Marketing is to be a rock. This metaphor encompasses being steady, solid, and dependable. It’s about being that constant presence in people’s lives, through the highs and lows, and through the good times and the tough times. Being a rock means that others know they can lean on you, trust you, and count on your unwavering support.

When I think back to my long relationship with Amee, the key to our lasting friendship was consistency. Over the years, I made sure to remain a steady presence in her life. It wasn’t about being flashy or overbearing; it was about being there, consistently and reliably. This consistency was reflected in how I presented myself both offline and online. Everyone knew that what they saw was what they got with me—a transparent and genuine connection.

In a world where flakiness and unreliability are all too common, standing out as someone dependable is invaluable. The simple act of showing up, especially showing up when you said you will, can set you apart. Consistency creates certainty, and certainty builds trust. People are drawn to those they can rely on, those who are their champions in both personal and professional spheres!

Some actionable steps to embody this trait include:

1. Always follow through. Make it a point to show up and do what you say you will. Let your actions consistently reflect your words.

2. Create a feeling of certainty. Your consistency in action and attitude creates a sense of certainty for others. They know what to expect from you and that they can count on you.

3. Be supportive. Ensure that you’re there for people, not just in business, but in life. Be their cheerleader, their confidant, and their rock!

As you become a rock for others, you also become a beacon of light, so to speak. In times of uncertainty, your steady presence can be a source of comfort and inspiration. By embodying these qualities, you become someone others aspire to emulate in their personal and professional growth.

So now that we’ve explored the five ‘BE’ Attributes, let’s circle back to Amee’s story. After a decade of nurturing our relationship, a moment came when she expressed interest in discussing business possibilities. This wasn’t an overnight success; rather, it was the fruit of ten years of genuine relationship-building. This is a testament to the power of patience and authenticity in Network Marketing. It’s not about putting a timeline on relationships but about genuinely caring and investing in them.

Each leader in my team has their own unique story, but one common thread is the absence of a timeline. I approached each relationship with the intent to support, understand, and grow together. This mindset of long-term relationship-building, not just for business but for personal growth, is what makes Network Marketing so unique and rewarding.

In this profession, we often focus on the immediate results. However, the true essence of success in this field is building long-lasting relationships that transcend business transactions. It’s about being a loving, human, creative, and dependable presence in the lives of those around you. When you approach relationships from this place of authenticity and care, you will grow your business and also enrich your life and the lives of others.

As we wrap up our chapter on the art of relationship building in Network Marketing, let’s reflect on the ‘BE’ Attributes we’ve discussed: Being Loving, Being Human, Being Creative, Being Valuable, and Being A Rock. Each of these attributes is a vital component in creating a successful, fulfilling career in this dynamic field.

Embracing these attributes isn’t just about enhancing your business; it’s about transforming the way you interact with the world. By coming from a place of genuine care, authenticity, creativity, contribution, and reliability, you’ll find that your network expands not just in size but in depth and quality! You’ll attract more leads, engage in more meaningful conversations, and build a business that’s not just profitable but also deeply rewarding.

However, before you take these strategies out into the world, I want to remind you that this will require patience. This approach demands what I like to call a ‘slowing down’ in your business strategy. It’s about taking the time to build real friendships, to cultivate relationships that go beyond mere transactions. People should see you as a real friend—someone who’s there for them in more ways than just business. If you’ve been engaging in transactional conversations by the dozen, like I was early on, this might feel a little uncomfortable. But I promise, it’s worth it!

I encourage you to focus on these five ‘BE’ Attributes and the action steps I’ve outlined. Implement them in your daily interactions and watch how they transform not only your business but also your personal growth. The true essence of Network Marketing lies in these human connections—in other words, the bonds we forge and the lives we touch.

Remember: the path to success in Network Marketing is paved with patience, empathy, and a willingness to be more than just a businessperson. You’re a friend, a mentor, a confidant, and a source of inspiration to those around you.

I look forward to hearing your success stories that stem from these principles! Let’s cultivate not just a network, but a community of amazing friendships and lasting connections. Here’s to your success in Network Marketing, grounded in the powerful ‘BE’ Attributes. Let’s make a difference, one relationship at a time! See you out there, ntwrkrs!